| Eddy: |
I just don't understand why anybody would do
a lesbian version of Oedipus Rex. |
| ----- |
| Stuart: |
We think that Larry is very scary. |
| Eddy: |
And, hairy. |
| Stuart: |
Very hairy. |
| Eddy: |
Very hairy. So be weary, of very scary, hairy,
Larry. |
| ----- |
| Alex: |
You are a closet heterosexual. |
| ----- |
| Eddy: |
Two's company, three's pathetic. |
| ----- |
| Stuart: |
You ever hear the expression, "the little head
thinking for the big head." I live by that. Trust me, it's
a beautiful way to live, I know. |
| ----- |
| Eddy: |
You can't say, "fag." It's, it's like when
one black guy calls another black guy "nigger." You can't
say it unless you are one. |
| Stuart: |
You just said "nigger," and you're not a black
guy. |
| Eddy: |
It's okay 'though, 'cause I'm a fag. |
| ----- |
| Alex: |
Why are you backing away from me? |
| Eddy: |
I'm not backing away from you, I'm just walking
backwards while you're walking forwards. |
| ----- |
| Alex: |
I'll mold you into a heterosexual with my bare
hands. |
| ----- |
| Alex: |
It's better to be honest than to be nice, okay. |
| Stuart: |
Fu** me for being nice. |
| ----- |
| Eddy: |
What I quickly realized about Stuart, is that
he lacked that part of the brain which would stop him from
saying things that might be offensive to other people. |
| ----- |
| Stuart: |
[D]on't you just want to take this girl, and,
like, grab her, and, I don't know, just, fu** her? |
| Eddy: |
Maybe. |
| ----- |
| Alex: |
[I]'m just asking you, that when you're done
voiding your bowels, you flush. |
| Stuart: |
After we're done what-ing our what? |
| Eddy: |
She means flush after taking one of those big
dumps, moron. |
| ----- |
| Alex: |
If you don't stop eating my yogurt, and I know
it was you, I'm gonna kill you. I'm gonna fu**ing kill you. |
| Stuart: |
You make murder sound so sexual. |
| ----- |
| Eddy: |
Before long, Alex and I were wrapped in conversation,
and Stuart, was not. |
| ----- |
| Stuart: |
You ever butt-fu**ed anybody? |
| ----- |
| Stuart: |
He doesn't need pussy. He needs dick, big hard
dick. |
| ----- |
| Alex: |
I find libraries very erotic. |
| ----- |
| Stuart: |
This girl, she is a live wire of sexual energy. |
|
