| Mr. Ruby: |
It's not your fault you're stupid. |
| ----- |
| Gen. Sline: |
A weapon unused is a useless weapon. |
| ----- |
| Emmett Fitz-Hume: |
Will you hold my wallet for me while I take
the test, please? There's a thousand dollars in there, or
maybe there isn't. Know what I mean? |
| Test Monitor: |
Are you saying I can take this money if I help
you pass the test? |
| Emmett Fitz-Hume: |
What do you think? |
| ----- |
| Capt. Hefling: |
What about that Red Chinese radio chatter? |
| Austin Millbarge: |
It's done. Here you go. |
| Capt. Hefling: |
Done? That was a static filled, triple scrambled,
microwave transmission between two soldiers talking in Mandarin
Chinese. |
| Austin Millbarge: |
Well, the Chinese were only using a simple
polyphoneticly grouped twenty square digit key, transposed
from booster verdonic form, with multiple nulls. I broke it
with this. |
| Capt. Hefling: |
A Drogen's Decoder Wheel? They put these into
cereal boxes for kid! |
| Austin Millbarge: |
Yeah, I found it in a box of, uh . . . Lucky
Charms. |
| ----- |
| Austin Millbarge: |
We need a plan. |
| Emmett Fitz-Hume: |
Let's play dead. |
| ----- |
| Emmett Fitz-Hume: |
Alright, stop right there and I'll bring back
the sun. Okay, this is my sister, you can all have her. I
hear she's very good. |
| ----- |
| Ace Tomato Courier: |
I have a priority package from the NATSAT printing
room. |
| Mr. Ruby: |
Well, why don't you say it a little louder?
We could open the window. You could shout it towards Moscow. |
| ----- |
| Col. Rhumbus: |
Listen, it's my job to get you prepared to
go out into the field for combat. Now, I must know right away
what I have to work with. I have made my decision. |
| Emmett Fitz-Hume: |
What's it say? |
| Austin Millbarge: |
"Pussy." |
| ----- |
| Austin Millbarge: |
For God's sake, show some balls! |
| Emmett Fitz-Hume: |
I think it's too late to try and impress them. |
| ----- |
| Mr. Ruby: |
You understand, sir, that we are responsible
for launching a nuclear weapon against our own country! |
| ----- |
| Bob Hodges: |
Why are you here? |
| Emmett Fitz-Hume: |
Why am I here? Why are you here? Why is anybody
here? I think it was Jean-Paul Sartre who once said . . .
how do you spell Sartre? |
| ----- |
| Emmett Fitz-Hume: |
Did you here that? |
| Austin Millbarge: |
Yeah, it's a dickfer. |
| Emmett Fitz-Hume: |
What's a dickfer? |
| Austin Millbarge: |
To pee with. |
| ----- |
| Austin Millbarge: |
You know what those things can do? Suck the
paint off your house and give your family a permanent orange
afro. |
| ----- |
| Emmett Fitz-Hume: |
I'm doctor Trobridge, and this is doctor .
. . |
| Austin Millbarge: |
Greenbaum. |
| Emmett Fitz-Hume: |
-berg. |
| Austin Millbarge: |
Greenbaum-berg |
| Emmett Fitz-Hume: |
-berg |
| Austin Millbarge: |
We're doctors. |
| ----- |
| Bob Hodges: |
Every minute you don't tell us why you are
here, I cut off a finger. |
| Emmett Fitz-Hume: |
Mine or yours? |
| Bob Hodges: |
Yours. |
| Emmett Fitz-Hume: |
Damn! |
| ----- |
| Austin Millbarge: |
You're spies like us! |
| ----- |
| Austin Millbarge: |
I was going to do your family a favor and hookup
the Disney Channel, for free. Well, forget it. |
| ----- |
| Austin Millbarge: |
Maybe your dick's not so dumb. |
| Emmett Fitz-Hume: |
Got me through high school. |
| ----- |
| Keyes: |
We're not recruiting for the Boy Scouts. We
want people who are aggressive. |
| ----- |
| Ace Tomato Agent: |
Won't you gentlemen have a Pepsi? |
| ----- |
| Gen. Sline: |
Welcome to W.A.M.P. |
 |
