Alright, let's say you're six, let me see the look on
your face on Christmas morning, when you creep down the
stairs and you see that red bike under the tree. You probably
never even had that experience.
Dickie Roberts:
Gotcha. Six, bike, tree, stairs. Holy sh**, a bike!
Rob Reiner:
You're six.
Dickie Roberts:
Holy crap, a bike!
Rob Reiner:
You're six.
Dickie Roberts:
Gaa gaa, goo goo, bikie.
Rob Reiner:
Too far back.
-----
Dickie Roberts:
This is nucking-futs!
-----
Dickie Roberts:
Champagne to my real friends, and I'm a real pain to my
sham friends.
-----
Dustin Diamond, Corey Feldman, and Barry
Williams:
Brick wall, waterfall, Danny thinks that he's got it all,
but he don't, and we do. So, boom with that attitude,
no Reese's Pieces, 7-Up, mess with us, we mess you up.
-----
Dickie Roberts:
Oh my God, I love Brendan Frasier!
Brendan Fraser:
Fraser!
Dickie Roberts:
It is Fraser, its Fraser.
-----
Announcer:
He had his name legally changed to "David Soul's Son."
Then tired of explaining who David Soul was, he tried
"Hutch's Son." Later, he changed it again to the element
chart symbols for fluorine, titanium, and zinc.
-----
Dickie Roberts:
Go for Dickie.
-----
Dickie Roberts:
I knew kids that were T.V. shows getting whiffed-up when
they were 16.
Sam Finney:
"Whiffed-up?"
Dickie Roberts:
Whiff, coke, toot, rails, nose candy, devil's dandruff,
power flour, sniffy-jiffy, booger sugar.
-----
Sidney Wernick:
I've called Reiner's office over and over, they won't
put me through. I must have left five to six to seven
or eight messages.
Dickie Roberts:
Well, then, leave nine, ten, or eleven.
-----
Sidney Wernick:
Dickie, I got you an audition.
Dickie Roberts:
You got me that audition? How?
Sidney Wernick:
Well, it's a long story, but its tomorrow at 3 o'clock.
Dickie Roberts:
Tomorrow at 3? I'll never be ready.
Sidney Wernick:
Well, you've gotta be ready! Because the audition's at
the hospital and then Rob's going under for an operation.
Dickie Roberts:
What, an operation?
Sidney Wernick:
Well, anyway, long story short, Rob needs a kidney, and
I'm giving him one of mine. We swap, a kidney for an audition!
-----
Sidney Wernick:
I may have to pee every 45 minutes, but at least I get
to pee in a gold toilet.
-----
Dickie Roberts:
Good night, prude people. Dream the dream of prudes. Prude
it up. Have a nice G-rated dream, full of . . .
Sam Finney:
Go to sleep, Dickie!
-----
Grace Finney:
This feels a little odd.
Dickie Roberts:
Dude, I'm the one in the stroller.
Grace Finney:
Did you just call me "dude?"
Dickie Roberts:
I mean, mommy.
CAST
Dickie Roberts (David
Spade)
Sidney Wernick (Jon Lovitz)
Grace Finney (Mary McCormack)
Sam Finney (Scott Terra)
Himself (Brendan Fraser)
Himself (Rob Reiner)
Himself (Corey Feldman)
Himself (Dustin Diamond)
Himself (Barry Williams)
